Tag Archives: naturism

284. The family commune – Give nudism a chance

284

I’ve got some “DD” things to share, but had this post half written so thought I’d finish it up before going on to kinkier things!    By the way, our party (283. We are three), is tonight.  All the preparations are done and it looks like the weather is going to cooperate.

I was having another one of those in-depth conversation with one of my sisters regarding my choices in life.   Yes, it had many of the same questions and issues she raised previously (Post 200. Balloons and Submission for one).     But this time, most of her concerns centered around nudity.   Her concerns were prompted by the fact that T&E’s home (my son and soon-to-be daughter-in-law) has jokingly become the “family commune.”

That is, it’s a place people in the family go to get away and relax.  I shared previously that the they bought a house on about 50 acres, and plan to have a small farm — beehives, some pigs, and chickens.  Both of them work full time jobs, so the farm is more a hobby and will be fairly small in scale.  Oh, and by the way, their wedding is in two weeks.

I also shared that E grew up in a naturist family — both her parents grew up that way and their relatives on both side are immersed in the naturist lifestyle with few exceptions.   T has adopted this, and subsequently so have we.   You can read all about this in several posts I’ve made —   227. Naturism Rant, 233. Meet the Nudies, 242. On the Nudie Farm, 250. The Nude Normal252.  Naked Caravan,   255. Vacation Naked264. Won’t you be my (nude) neighbor?

Wow, has this turned into a nudist blog?  Ha!

Anyway — as shared in 252. Naked Carvan, many of my nieces and nephews made the trek to T&E’s house in part to chip in and help out with renovations and clearing some of the land, and in part to just have fun and hang out.   Most of them are young adults ranging from early 20’s to early 30’s.  One niece, my sister’s daughter, is 17.   And yes, when in Rome, you do as the Romans do…or in this case, when at T&E’s, you do as the nudist’s do.  They all got naked. 

Since that initial visit, it’s a rare weekend that T&E don’t have some guests — one of T’s cousin’s spending a day or two.  Sometimes they even bring a friend.  And far from feeling intruded upon, T&E both love this as they like the idea of their house being a gathering place.   And despite some reservations, there are times my sister has allowed her 17-year old to visit and spend a day or even night on the farm – and she has also brought a friend with her (female friend). 

Well, unbeknownst to my sister, on one of her daughter’s day trips to the farm she went with her boyfriend.  My niece eventually told her mom (my sis) after the fact, and it didn’t sit well with her.   My sister knows her daughter is having sex, so it isn’t that fact that disturbs her.  It is just the idea of “flaunting their bodies” in front of each other and the “obviously sexually charged atmosphere” of it all.

MY NUDISM RANT
My sisters are pretty good at pushing my buttons and sending me on a rant (120. Is this submissive a feminist? MAGA rant).  And so I proceeded along the lines of what I posted in Post 227. Naturism Rant

In her mind, the get-a-ways to the farm are nothing more than a sex filled day of debauchery.   I tried to explain that nudism and sex are distinct, and in fact, nudism serves to de-sexualize nudity, not hyper-sexualize it.

I told my sister her reaction is based on preconceived notions about nudity that conjure up feelings of shame, embarrassment, guilt, and sex.  Heck, even the bible tells us about the moment humans first “realized” they were naked, quickly followed by the moment they were first ashamed of being naked. 

In her mind, showing off a naked body sends out sexual signals that threaten the security of relationships and mankind.   And what better way to suppress nudity than to use shame, as shame is the ideal emotion to enforce any code of conduct.  Shame sucks – and we tend to want to avoid feeling it at all costs.

Well, whether it is shame of nakedness or shame over our kinks or shame over anything else —  we are not born with shame.  Instead, we learn it.   And the shame we learn is artificial — there should be no shame in it.  It only exists because we agree it exists and we agree it exists as a way of controlling conduct.  (And you can easily substitute the word “sin” for “shame,” but I won’t go there).

At one time I was right there with sis  – I felt the shame in it as well.  Hell, I know that is exactly why we made nudity part of my duties in my DD.  It was a way to feel some degree of shame or humbleness.   Well, since adopting nudism, I do not get any “kink” or “submissive” satisfaction from being naked.  That “shame” feeling has been purged.

And nothing changed, except my perception – which is what makes “shame” such a false feeling when it comes to nudity.  There is nothing shameful about it.   Only your perception makes it so.    And to justify that feeling, we then attach all sorts of terrible things to nakedness — it must be sexual, it must be prurient, it must weaken the fibers of society, it must be a contributor to all that is bad, etc, etc.   Well that’s just crap, and I told her so. 

Not to be so naive, I did concede that sure, her daughter might have had sex when she went to T&E’s with her boyfriend, no more than they might do so anytime they have the chance.  I mean, they are teenagers!    But if they did, it wasn’t because of the nudity.  

Ultimately, I urged my sister to spend a day at T&E’s, nude herself.   And not just holed up in their house, but go about the property, visit with E’s cousin’s (who live next door – 233. Meet the Nudies,  Even go there with her daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend!

I said that knowing that while she might give it a try herself, there was no way she would do so with her daughter’s boyfriend along.  But my sister surprised me.  “Okay, if V (her husband) is up for it, we’ll make a go at it, including inviting her boyfriend.”   My jaw dropped.  I thought she was kidding.  But not only wasn’t she kidding, but she actually followed through.  

To make a long story short — they spent a weekend at T&E’s – two days/one night.   

SIS GETS NAKED
My sister came back with mixed reviews, but with some changes in her attitude about nudism.  She agreed she was starting to feel more comfortable and less self-conscious towards the end, but still wasn’t fully comfortable.  However, she really focused on everyone else and could see just how “normal” everyone else treated the nudity around them.  She could see that there weren’t “sexual sparks flying around.”  She even admitted there was an element of fun for her and her husband.   

And she admitted her self-consciousness started to morph towards self-affirmation regarding her body image.  She is a little overweight, and is 57, so was admittedly uneasy.   And while she never got 100% comfortable, the comfort she saw in others made her want to try this again and get to their level of comfort.

I am so proud of her for being willing to “risk it” and give this go.   She also had wonderful things to say about T&E and had many of the same wonderful observations that I already shared about E’s cousin’s (The Nudies).

A few days after my sisters return from T&E’s, she said she looks forward to visiting them again some time soon, and, told me that perhaps they would join us if we decided to do a nude vacation again. 

Wow.  I am so surprised, but elated.   It reconfirmed my experience that nudism is addicting, and after a surprisingly very little adjustment period, feels so natural and so uplifting.   You become a walking self-affirmation and have this tremendous sense of freedom, a sense of being one with the people and nature around you.   I believe this is why Mike took to it, much to my surprise, and why my sister seems to taking to it, even more to my surprise!

I definitely recommend everyone give nudism a try. 

NEXT: 285. Curfew and Spanking the Jelly?

227. Naturism Rant

227

I shared how my soon to be daughter-in-law was raised a naturist (aka nudist).   Since her revelation, we are now planning a joint vacation at a naturistt resort complete with her family, which we will be meeting for the first time.

Sorry to go on and on in this post.  I am just so fascinated by the things E shared.  So, indulge me, and maybe my next post will share something more salacious. 

E brought tons of pictures and shared many stories of her countless vacations growing up.   In addition to several trips a year to a resort, they lived close to a nudist beach that they would go to all of the time.  She also had relatives they would visit who lived in a clothing optional community.   

The pictures were amazing.  Seeing the total acceptance and comfort of everyone in their “birthday suits” was heartwarming.  All shapes, sizes, and ages.  It was beautiful.  I think it is difficult to imagine if you have never seen pictures like this or have never been to a clothing optional place.  It is easy to imagine that the first thoughts are likely of sex, debauchery, or perversion (or all three!).  It is none of those.  

The ease and comfort at which E would shared the photos was amazing.  Pictures of her naked with her siblings, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, or friends – pictures that spanned pretty much her lifetime.  All just doing things that people do on vacation.  You can see the fun, joy, and merriment that you see in any family pictures.   The difference of course, is that everyone is naked.   It was beautiful to sense the lack of modesty and shame from every one, regardless their age.

WE WILL GO AS A FAMILY (likely)
There is a resort her and her family have gone to before that appears to have excellent handicap amenities, so we are likely going to take J with us.  We haven’t told him yet as we want to finalize our plans first, plus, we will wait until it is closer to actually going as he does not do well with any anticipation of any sorts.  As for the nudity, that isn’t even our concern.   We know he will handle it just fine.  In fact, he will be more comfortable and casual about it than perhaps my middle child, T2.   Although I haven’t talk to T2 about it, my oldest did talk to his brother about it.  As expected, T2 was not that enthusiastic.  He didn’t say no, but didn’t say yes – and it may not matter.  He graduates college in May and has a job lined up, so might not be able to go anyway.

SHALL WE ALL GET NAKED?
Oh, and in case you were wondering, E and I were both naked during her visit, and when Kayla got home she got naked as well.  Mike was at work.

E spends as much of her life as clothes free as possible, meaning she is naked most of the time she is at home.  She has immersed T1 into the lifestyle as well, and with little exception, she said he tends to be naked around the house as well.  Since Mike and I are fine with it, and obviously E and T1 are fine with it, we talked about whether we should all be naked when we get together.  Her and I agreed that as far as we were concerned, absolutely!  We would leave it up to the guys if they wanted to join in, or if Mike doesn’t want to allow it at all. I have since asked Mike, and he said he is open to it, and “we will see.”  That typically means “Yes!”

I asked E if she would want to disrobe if everyone else kept their clothes on.  I found her answer interesting.   She said for her it depends.  She has family members who aren’t into the lifestyle and it isn’t uncommon at some family get together to have a mix if clothed and nude bodies.  Some naturist family members are more “militant” than others and will shed their clothes whenever they can, regardless.  Others will tend to take their cues from the situation.  For instance, she will keep her clothes on if at the house of a family member who doesn’t partake.  However, if it is at her home, family members know to expect she will be naked.

She said whether we wear clothes or not, at her home, she wants to be naked even if no one else is.  As for our house, since we are accepting, she is comfortable being the only one naked if that is how it has to be.  I find this all so fascinating and just how comfortable and nonchalant E is about this.  I guess growing up the way she did, she probably feels us “textiles” are the oddity.  

E has immersed me in naturism etiquette and helped dispel myths I had.  Even though I see the beauty in it, I have concerns about the perverts out there, ogling women, especially young girls or boys.  She shared that it just isn’t like that.  There might be more of that at a public nude beach, but she has never sensed it or seen it at resorts.  She has heard of incidents though.  She said the facilities screen people and everyone can tell if someone’s behavior is a bit “off.”  They get reported and dealt with.

Of course, perverts come in all aspects of society.  They may be “of the cloth” literally and figuratively, or they may be nudists.  But neither infer perversion.  In all her experience, and that of her family (going back to her grandparents!) is that, of course it makes sense to be aware of weirdos, but it is no different if going to the mall or going to a nude beach or resort.

I don’t intend this to be all about E, but her upbringing is so intriguing to me.  She assures me the intriguing parts aren’t about nudism, but perhaps about the bohemian, even gypsy like lifestyle of many of her family members.  But briefly – both sets of her grandparents were nudists, and her parents met at a nude resort.  So she has aunts and uncles on both sides of her family that practice naturism.  There are some that opted out of the lifestyle, but most stayed in.  And despite the avant-garde environment of her family,  while there are a handful of artists in the bunch, most are college educated white collar professionals.  Surprising, but I know my surprise is simply because of my own biases.

EXHIBITIONISM?
I admitted to her that I have an exhibitionist streak in me, but, the feeling I get from exhibitionism is different from what I was feeling about this trip. However, I couldn’t articulate the difference I was feeling, only that the exhibitionist in me isn’t what is excited about going to a nude resort.   While I couldn’t come up with the words to explain what I was feeling, E put it into her own words. 

She thought of it this way – She said she doesn’t consider herself an exhibitionist at all, and doesn’t believe anyone in her family considers themselves one either (in fact, I think she was slightly offended by a perceived implication that they are related).  She went on to say that it isn’t about some extravagant way of presenting yourself.  It is about the most normal and human way of presenting yourself.  To her, exhibitionism is about “Look at me, look at what I am doing.”  Whereas naturalism is about telling people, “I see you, you see me, we are all connected as humans, so let us respect and treat each other with kindness.”

Yeah, she pretty much hit the nail on the head regarding what I was feeling re I wasn’t connecting it to my exhibitionism.  It is about the purity of it all that attracts me – the feeling of connection at a very basic core.  So simple, so pure.  And, in all the pictures she showed me, I don’t think there were any where people aren’t smiling!   It seems like a happy place to be.  Not because of the visuals, but because of the overall vibe.

She said for her it doesn’t even dawn on her that she is naked or those around her are naked.  No more than it dawns on a “textile” to notice someone’s elbow or arm that is showing.  It is processed by her brain as just “normal” and thus doesn’t even register as a “thing” to take notice of.  However, she did say that, just like someone with clothes who has a part of their body that is different than the norm, you do notice people who are naked that also have parts that are different from the norm.  But that doesn’t mean it is sexualized.  Noticing an exceptionally large penis doesn’t make it sexual, any more than noticing someone with larger than normal hands is sexual.  Of course, if you have a hand fetish… but I digress. 

EROTIC?
And frankly, the visuals, while beautiful, aren’t erotic.  I know it must be hard for some people to separate a naked body from erotic thoughts.  I didn’t see or feel anything erotic in any of the pictures she showed me or from being naked with her.  Once you have seen people of various shapes and sizes, from small to large you name its, from saggy to shriveled whatsits, crooked this, crooked that, cock-eyed nipples, cellulite, body rolls, etc., etc., you quickly see past the visuals.  You just see joy,  the humanity, see the person for who they are, not what they look like or are or aren’t wearing.   That’s the beauty of it. 

Ha, my first naturism rant!  And I haven’t been officially initiated yet!

YAWN, GIVE ME A SPANKING!
You know what?  It’s been awhile since I’ve talked D/s.  So, enough about naturism, enough about
my research, or my youthful indiscretions. how about a spanking story?  I went 19 days without punishment until a transgression resulted in a pretty harsh spanking (are there other kinds?).   They have all been pretty harsh when they come.  But I am not complaining, giggle giggle!    I’ll share it on my next post. 

Next: 228. Addicted to Vulnerability (psst…and a spanking story)