Tag Archives: embarrassed

296. Piercings and Pubes

296

If you haven’t figured out by now, I lack an ability to be succinct.   I am not one to say in a few words what I can exhaustively analyze, deconstruct, and put back together in hundreds of words.  See, even then I couldn’t just leave it as an inability to be succinct.

I thought this would be a quick post.  Simply to state that I let my nipple piercings close and have been growing my pubic hair.    

Done.  End of post!

Not.

JEN IS EMBARRASSED?
I am not one to normally feel self-conscious about things, whether it is what people think about TTWD, or about my appearance, or really about anything.   However – I found myself becoming more self-conscious about my nipple piercings and pubic hair.  

It’s ironic that our nudism was part of the trigger for this uneasiness.  After all, I’ve found that nudism makes you less self-conscious and more accepting of your body.   Yeah, I get it.  I can try to rationalize away my uneasiness, but sometimes, you just can’t.  You feel what you feel and you just have to deal!  Emotions don’t care about logic.   

Pre-nudism, my piercings and pubic hair were private and limited to the purview of those involved in TTWD.  But now that we are full-fledged nudists, well, it ain’t so private anymore!  And had a growing self-perception was that I was putting out a message that didn’t represent me or my thoughts.  Something had to change.  Those thoughts weren’t changing, so, the piercings had to go, and the hair had to return. 

HAIR DOWN THAIR
For the longest time, Mike had me and Kayla with the same “look” down there, whether it be hair or no hair.  But then Mike went through a phase where he had one of us sporting one look while the other sports another.  “Visual variety” as he calls it!   Um, okay, as if our different physiques weren’t visual enough.  Mine is not to question why.  Mine is but to do or get spanked!   lol

My self-consciousness over this started when I was bare and Kayla was bushy.  It started to feel to me like I was putting out the perception that I was trying too hard to do what the young folks do.  

And it wasn’t just my mind comparing myself to Kayla.  When we are at T & E’s farm, I am often the only one bare down there.   At times the 17-year old has been bare, but it messes with my mind either way.  When she is bare, I feel like I am trying to “style” myself after the teenager.  When she doesn’t, it compounds my self-consciousness that I am the odd one.  

NIFTY 50
Part of what was going through my mind is that I am going to be 50 later this year.  I also think 
my tattoo added another wrinkle to a weakened psyche.  Not to say a 50-year old can’t rock a new tat along with her nipple piercings and bare pussy. . . but THIS 50-year old?  Why do I want piercings drawing more attention to my vein-marbled-droopy-boobies along with looking like I am trying really hard to “compete” with Kayla?

Adding to what was influencing my emotions — I am only around naked women who are younger than me, and sometimes much younger.  Kayla is the 24-year old with the awesome figure, yet no nipple piercings.  (She did pierce her nipples and clit shortly after moving in with us, but let them close-up only after a few months).  

Again, I get it.  I know there is nothing wrong with anyone of any age piercing whatever they want to pierce, or having their pubic hair in whatever shape or length that they want, or getting a new tattoo at any age.    It was just for me, all this added up to something my psyche wasn’t comfortable with it. 

THE GUYS?
For whatever reason, the pube situation in the men and boys has no influence over my uneasiness.  If you are keeping score, you can mark down Mike as one who goes back and forth with his look.  Frankly, he would probably leave it grown out but Kayla enjoys shaving him and he never refuses when she asks.  And as for other menfolk, it’s a mixed bag of various looks from bare to full to all things in-between.  

MIKE’S SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS
In discussing this with Mike, he shared that he also was starting to feel a bit self-conscious about the pube thing, but with Kayla.  H
e said the first time we were around others and Kayla was bare and I wasn’t, he started to think others might be inclined to think he wants Kayla to look like a little girl.  Like, it isn’t enough that she is so much younger than him, and is very youthful in her physique, but she makes herself look more like a little girl.  Wow, that never crossed my mind, but once he said it, I too had a hard time getting it out of my mind.

REFLECTION
We both know that the chances are good these thoughts are only in our mind and not what others are thinking.  And even if they aren’t 
thinking such things, so what?  Right?  Well, again, you can’t rationalize away some thoughts.   

It would be different for us if the “others” we are talking about were strangers at a nudist beach or kink-friends involved in TTWD.   But we are a family of nudists in a growing family of nudists.  I think that’s why, in this particular situation, I am more sensitive to thinking about what others might be thinking. 

I don’t mind people thinking odd or ill thoughts of me regarding our relationship with Kayla or any aspect of TTWD that they may be privy too.   If they don’t like it, well, too bad.   But, it bothers me to think that others may believe that I feel I am in competition with Kayla, and it bothers Mike to think others may believe he is into little girls.   To be clear, no one has ever indicated or implied any such things.   These are just things in our minds, but they are powerful enough that we have addressed them. 

And don’t think I am some fragile self-conscious timid and insecure person.   I am not.  But when it comes to my nipple piercings and my bare pubic area —  well, guilty!  

HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW?
So piercings are gone and hair is growing back. 

I remain committed to sporting whatever type of pubic hair, or lack thereof, that Mike wishes, and will pierce whatever part of my body he wants me to pierce.  But for now, he has allowed me to remove the piercings.  And he had Kayla shave so that both she and I were bare together, and then we both have been growing it in for about a month now.

I sense at some point I will look back at this and not relate to feeling self-conscious and find my feelings silly.  But frankly, it is not up to me anyway.  I will share with Mike whatever it is I am felling at whatever time he may ask about it, and will abide by his demands.   I just hope he doesn’t ask for a bejeweled butterfly a la the image I used on this post!  Then again, maybe I can usher in a new trend for the newly 50-somethings!

Next: Post 297. Love without Limits.  My Ode to Blogging. 

92.The Inspection. Defining Necessary.

shy

Thanksgiving
I hope your Thanksgiving was as wonderful as mine.  We spent time with all three of our kids and extended family as we went to my parents’ house for Thanksgiving.  They live about three hours away – a perfect distance for my liking.  Close enough for an easy visit, but far enough away that visits don’t have to be weekly or monthly – ha!

My eldest and his girlfriend left our festivities a bit early to spend time with her family, and my middle child left late in the afternoon to go camping with some friends.  My parents invited J to stay the weekend with them.  He loves staying with them – I mentioned before that typically he stays with them two full weeks out of the summer.  My parents are getting older and I am starting to have concerns about their ability to care for him.  He can be physically demanding at times.  Luckily my sister and her family said they were going to stay the weekend as well, so that meant not only more support to care for J, but more fun as he always enjoys his cousins.  That also meant was that Mike and I could be alone for the long weekend!

Kayla Visits
On Friday we invited Kayla over so we could have our long awaited talk.  She was ready to present “her document” (as mentioned in Post 91) where she wrote down her thoughts on what she wants out of a relationship with us.  She also asked Mike and me to prepare something as well regarding our thoughts on what we want.

She came over around 10 am, nervous, but eager to share.  I was not naked!  Kayla has seen me before in my submissive and naked state, but given that this was a time for us to focus on her without potential distraction or awkwardness, Mike asked me to get dressed as Kayla arrived.

I will use another post to talk about what Kayla put in her “document.”  For now I want to share something very surprising that occurred. 

Kayla handed us each a copy of the document she prepared.  As we were reading I could see that Kayla was very fidgety in her chair, biting her nails and looking down at the floor.  She asked, “What about the document you prepared for me?”

I responded that we didn’t prepare one for her.  She was clearly disappointed and annoyed.

“Hey guys, I really put a lot into this document and was looking forward to reading what you wanted from me.  I really poured out my soul here and I wanted to get your thoughts so I could consider your suggestions.”

Mike responded, “Kayla, what we want in a relationship with you is very simple.  We can sum it all up in one sentence, and tell you what, Jen will go ahead and write it out for you.   I grabbed a pen and pad, wrote it out, signed it, handed it to Mike and he signed it, and then I handed it to Kayla.

It read, “We want to help Kayla grow towards becoming the person SHE wants to become, whatever that person may be, not defined or limited by what we want or what anyone else wants.”

Kayla read the note and said, “Thank you, that’s so sweet, but still, I was hoping for some help so that I don’t make mistakes.”

Mike, knowing Kayla’s penchant for perfectionism, responded, “Kayla, that’s our point.  You have to discover what is and isn’t a mistake for you.  Mistakes not only should be expected, they must be welcomed as they are required as part of discovering yourself.  When you make a mistake, and you will, it means you are going about this correctly.  I am sure we will have some advice and guidance for you along the way, but it wouldn’t be right for us to limit something you want, or push something you don’t want.  There simply isn’t anything appropriate for us to suggest other than what Jen just wrote down for you.”

As Mike and I continued reading, Kayla was becoming more and more fidgety, pursing her lips and acting as if we were professors reading her dissertation.  With a lot of tentativeness in her delivery, she said, “I understand what you are saying, but, I know I’ll need your help and I was hoping for some constructive suggestions as to what some good acts of service and transgressions would be.”

At that point Mike put the paper down and looked at Kayla and said, “Okay, Kayla, do you really want some help in the details regarding your submission?”

“Yes,” Kayla responded.

“First, from now on it is ‘Yes, Sir’ when you speak to me,” Mike calmly stated.

“Yes, Sir, said Kayla.

“Secondly, stand up and take your clothes off,” Mike said in a matter-of-fact tone.

Kayla looked over at me with her eyes as big as saucers.  I felt like saying, “Mike, no, not now,” but I held back.

Kayla hesitated for a moment.  Mike didn’t repeat himself and just stared at her in silence.  It was probably all of five seconds but it felt like 60 when Kayla slowly stood up.  She looked at me, then at Mike, then at the floor.  She then began unbuttoning her shirt with a tremble in her hands.  Mike then told me to go get our full length pedestal mirror from our bedroom. I had no clue what he was planning, but I obeyed without question.

I quickly retrieved it and brought it into the room as Kayla was pulling off her panties and was now completely naked.  Surprisingly, Mike then told me to disrobe.  Whatever was on his mind wasn’t anything we discussed regarding what we would say to Kayla.  Of course, I continued to simply obey and I undressed.  He told me to stand by the chair I had been sitting in across the coffee table from where Kayla was standing.

Kayla was very nervous and clearly embarrassed as she stared at the floor. Mike placed the mirror in front of Kayla and told Kayla to look at herself and then to look over at me.  He asked Kayla what differences she saw.  Kayla began to describe some physical differences and he stopped her.

“No, not in looks.  What difference do you see in your beauty compared to Jenny?”

WTF?  Wow, that seemed harsh.  He knows she is insecure. What was he doing?  I stayed silent.  Kayla’s eyes began to tear up and she was puzzled.  “What do you mean?

“What do you mean, Sir,” Mike corrected her.

That only made Kayla more nervous as her lower lip trembled as she fought to not start crying.

Mike responded, “Kayla, physically you are just as beautiful as Jen or any other woman.  Your face and your body is very attractive, beautiful, and sexy.  But, it isn’t your body where people see beauty, or lack thereof.  It is in your energy, and frankly Kayla, your energy is very unappealing.”

While Mike was talking very monotone with no anger or disgust in his voice, Kayla’s eyes teared up and tears slowly began to stream down her face.  I was so tempted to intervene and just hug her and tell her it is all okay and I told myself I’ll give it just another minute or two before I just had to react.

Mike continued, “Kayla, you have a hard time making eye contact with us for more than a second and you can barely look at the mirror without immediately looking back the floor.  Your elbows are pressed tightly against your torso, your hands are in a fist, your knees are touching, your shoulders are drooping down, your bottom lip is tucked under your top lip, and you are slouched over.  Physically you are amazingly beautiful, but you carry your beauty like a meek apology instead of as a bold statement.  That’s what I want to help you with.”

Mike continued, “Since you want suggestions, I have an idea for a requirement of your submission, in fact, I will include Jen in this requirement as well.  We are going to have inspections, and we will have the first one right now.”

The Inspection
Mike called Kayla over to him and Mike stood up.  He said the inspection consists of him inspecting our bodies.  He said this will be a practice run without any punishments and the grading would be simple.  He explained, “You start with an A, and for each infraction you drop a letter grade. Anything less than an A is a punishment for you, and anything less than a B results in BOTH of you being punished.  I want both of you to be accountable to each other for maintaining yourselves at my standards.  So if one of you gets a C or worse, then both of you are punished.  Understood?

“Yes Sir,” we both responded.

Mike looked at Kayla’s head and said, “Your hair is nice, still an A.  And your make-up, it doesn’t matter to me if you wear any or a little, but I don’t want to see a whole lot. No need to cover your lovely face.  What you have on right now looks nice, so, still an A.”

I noticed that with just those few sentences from Mike that Kayla’s physical demeanor already began to change. She was standing taller and she was making more eye contact with Mike.  She seemed eager to absorb every word of his and her body seemed more relaxed.

Mike then told Kayla to open up her mouth.  He stuck a finger in and stretched her mouth open a bit and looked closely at her teeth.  “Okay,” he said, “in fairness, you didn’t know this was coming and we were just snacking on some stuff, so, yeah, not so good.   You’ll have to get in the habit of brushing and flossing right after every meal or snack.  So, yeah, that takes you to a B.”  He said it so nicely and jokingly that Kayla continued to be put at ease and there was actually a small smile on her face.

“Okay,” said Mike, “now your posture.  You need to get those shoulders back and stand up straight with your chest out.  Get those arms unglued from the side of your body, open up your stance a little, stand tall and proud.  Next time, that will cost you a letter, but we’ll keep you at a B for now.  Now, let me see your hands.”

Kayla put out her hands and Mike looked them over and said, “I think you know the grade now.  You are down to a C as you need to work on not biting your nails.  Tell you what, Jenny will take you for a manicure and pedicure, on us, as a welcome gift.  How does that sound?”

“Great, Sir,” said Kayla.   Her eyes now showed a spark and enthusiasm that hadn’t been present before.

“Alright, now, your breasts,” said Mike.  Just so you know, I am making this up as I go.  I hadn’t given inspections any thought until you seemed desperate for some guidance from us.  Clearly, I need to have some requirements of presenting your breasts.”

Mike put his fingers on his chin as if this required deep contemplation as he stared at Kayla’s breasts.

He snapped his fingers and said, “I got it.  When I call inspection, I want you to quickly tweak or pull your nipples so that they are as erect as you can get them in say, 10 seconds. That should be enough to satisfy what I am looking for.  Please do that for me now.”

With that, Kayla raised each hand to one breast, pinched her nipples and twisted and pulled for about 10 seconds, just long enough to get them to protrude a bit.  This even prompted a giggle from Kayla and a smiling “How’s that, Sir?”  She seemed to be totally at ease now and appeared to like the fact that Mike was looking at her breasts so intently.

“Great,” said Mike, “no change in your grade so you are still at a C, in fact, they look so nice maybe I’ll raise your grade to a B.”

Kayla laughed and said, “But Sir, when talking about my breasts I prefer to hear “C” and not “B.”  This was clearly a reference to her describing her breasts to me as “barely a C cup.”   Mike laughed and smiled and said, “Okay, then, you are still a C.”   All of this was even more evidence that Kayla had quickly become relaxed and comfortable.

He then gazed down between the stubble between her legs and said, “Now, tell me what you got going on down stairs?”

Kayla said, “Well sir, I normally keep it bare but I am a bit overdue for a shave.   I wasn’t expecting to be naked for anyone.”

“Fair enough,” Mike agreed, “but if you are going to be bare it needs to stay cleanly shaven at all times.  You’ll need to make a daily habit of shaving as anything less than totally smooth will decrease your grade.  So, if this were a real inspection, you would now be at D.

“And, now your toes.  I guess you can’t bite your toenails so they look nice.  So, there you have it, if this would have been a real inspection you would have a D and both you and Jen would be punished.  Again, I want the two of you to be accountable to each other to always be ready for an inspection at any time.

“Yes, Sir, but just so you know,” Kayla responded with a smile on her face, “I can bite my toenails, I just chose not to.”

“What?” Mike said a bit bewildered.

“Let me show you, Sir,” And with that, Kalya sat down and proceeded to put her toe in your mouth.  “Yes, I am very flexible” she proclaimed.

It was amazing how Kayla transformed in the span of a few minutes.  What had just been a bundle of nerves, shyness, and embarrassment was now comfortable, bubbly, and proud.  I couldn’t be more elated with what Mike was able to accomplish with this impromptu inspection idea.  It was unexpected and amazing, but wasn’t quite over.

Mike then said, “Oh, I almost forgot, the inspection isn’t quite over.  Kayla, please stand back up, turn around, and bend over.”

Kayla did so but was a bit befuddled.

“Okay, reach back and spread your ass cheeks,” commanded Mike.  Kayla did so and I could see once again she was pursing her lips.

Okay Kayla, sorry to say that you are now an F.  I expect your asshole to be clean as a whistle at all times, clean enough to eat, literally.  Okay, stand back up.”

Well, that was a buzzkill.  Mike then asked me to stand in front of him and he proceeded to inspect me.  It isn’t important to the story, but I got a B – hey, we had never done an inspection before so I wasn’t prepared.  I will be next time, as will Kayla.

With my inspection complete Mike asked Kayla if she had any questions or concerns about everything that had transpired thus far.

“Yes, Sir,” she said, “I just keep thinking about the inspection of my butt.  The mood was just getting so positive and then that.  Was that really necessary?”

Mike paused for a moment as he calculated his response.   “Necessary.  Necessary.  Humm… great word.”

Mike continued, “I think other than the lesson that mistakes should be welcomed as part of your growth, the next best lesson is actually about that word.  What is necessary?”   My mind jumped to a scene in the movie The Matrix as Morpheus discusses “What is real” with Neo, but I digress.

“Kayla, necessary to what?  Heck, Jen and I were married almost 25 years before Domestic Discipline.  Is it necessary for me to spank Jen or discipline her in any particular way?   Is it necessary to have an assortment of paddles, or use butt plugs, nipple clamps, or a tack bra?   Is submission itself even necessary?  The answer is simple.  No, it is not necessary.”

“In fact, Kayla, I think this takes our discussion full circle to where Jen and I started with you regarding our advice.  What is necessary is up to you.  My role is to help you find what is necessary to give you the level of submission and fulfillment that you want for yourself.  What is it that will give you the positive feelings that you want, that allows you to meet your commitments to yourself, and to allow you to become more like the person you strive to be?  I read enough in your paper to see that you want to become more confident in your body image.  I believe the best way to get comfortable in your skin is to, well, show more skin.  Through the continued acceptance and admiration that you will experience, the greater your confidence will grow.”  Laughingly, Mike then said, “Kayla, before long you’ll be willing to show anyone your asshole for no particular reason.”

We all laughed.  With that, Mike said, “Now let’s finish reading your document and talk about what’s next.”

Kayla asked, “Can we get dressed now, Sir.”

“No.  You might as well get used to both of you being naked around the house as long as the kids aren’t around.”

We completed reading her document and talking more about her vision for her submission and how the living arrangements would work.   I’ll share more about her document and our next steps in my next post.

Happy Thanksgiving!

NEXT: 93. Post Inspection.  Defining Needs.

91. Undressing Kayla

undress

What a whirlwind of delightful debauchery!  As the time with Donna as a house guest has ended our attention turns to Kayla who will likely move in with us.

I’ll admit my title for this post is a bit of click bait.  I am referring to undressing Kayla in a metaphorical way, as in revealing more about the true Kayla, and not about physically undressing her (yet).  Sorry, for the tease!

I preface this by saying that no written description of her, or anyone, is complete.  We are all more than a page full of labels and adjectives.  Whatever words I use are bound to have various connotations for each reader.  As much as possible I am using Kayla’s words in how she describes herself, with some of my perspective added in.  I got her permission to share these details with you.

RECAP
Here’s a quick recap up of what I previously shared.  I introduced her in Post 76 and wrote more about her in Posts 77, 78, 79, and 80.   Yep, lots about Kayla lately.  She is 22 and has grown up with a consistent presence in our household.   She’s been a babysitter for my youngest but was always more than that – she was an extension to our family.  Over the years she spent a lot of time in my house, even went on some vacations with us.  We’ve helped her emotionally through tough times, and watched as she blossomed into an intelligent and caring young adult.  I recently revealed my DD lifestyle with her and she was highly curious.  Lastly, she is soon moving in with us.   There, that’s the recap.

“Naked” Truth.
Kayla has always been wise beyond her years, and since childhood she always had friends that were older than her.  Growing up she interacted and related more to my oldest son who is four years older than her, versus my middle child who is basically her same age.  Their interaction and friendship was always platonic and they behaved more like cousins than friends.  Kayla had unique interests that my kids didn’t share.  While they enjoyed her company, she likely would not be someone they would have been friends with if not for the inclusion that Mike and I sought to provide her.

She readily admits to being the “quirky girl,” a bit of a bookworm, and on the shy side.  She’s beautiful but carries a lot of negative thoughts about her body image.  She is 5’4 and wishes she was taller, her weight is fine for her height, but she wishes she was skinnier, her 32c bust in her words are, “just barely a C-cup and overall just unremarkable.”  She is self-conscious of her complexion.  Had some bad acne that left very slight scaring, not very noticeable, easy to cover with makeup, but the slight imperfections are massive craters in her mind, not to mention two small chicken pox scars that add to her insecurities.

She admits to feeling “dismissed” by her parents.  They were not overtly mean and while she has many positive memories, they weren’t as numerous as she’d like and were also mixed in with a lot of not so positive ones.  The way she puts it is that they were outwardly loving when they “had” to be.  She describes it as a sort of benign neglect.  She knows her parents had their own hang-ups and shortcomings and feels perhaps their lack of high involvement and interest in her was a reflection of her parents attempt not to repeat their own messed up childhood.  In other words, she feels her parents felt they probably couldn’t parent well, so they tried not to parent at all.  She recognizes that it is possible that actually gave her a better childhood than if her parents reverted to parenting the way they were brought up.

She is empathetic to a fault with a high “emotional radar” where she can quickly sense the emotions a person is feeling.   I have often been concerned she was a co-dependent in the making as she would often take on the problems of other people.  In trying to help others fix themselves, their problems became her problems (I can relate!!).  Unfortunately, often her love and empathy was twisted into leverage that simply enabled the other person to never take responsibility and truly fix their own problems, or worse, project onto her the blame for their ongoing problems.

She is sweet, kind, and thoughtful.  She can be bubbly and funny on rare occasions, but too often you can sense the weight of the problems that she is carries on behalf of others.  There are occasions where you can see a void in her eyes, as if joy and acceptance eludes her.  She is very shy around people she doesn’t know, but is very open with her thoughts and feelings when talking to me or Mike.

She talks about the years of growing up around our household in very glowing terms.  The warmth of my family, the joy of just hanging around us, even when we weren’t doing any particular fun activity.  According to her my household is “light and non-judgmental, where satisfaction replaces shame, and affection replaces disregard.”  I would be happy with the nice complement if I wasn’t saddened that she couldn’t have that in her home.

Most of her small circle of friends are either married or living with boyfriends/girlfriends.  She yearns to get out of her mom’s house and didn’t like the few choices she had for potential roommates to share an apartment.  She loves the idea of moving in with us as a good first step towards getting out on her own.  She said she could never feel as secure living anywhere else but with us.  And none of her reasoning has to do with submission or sex.  It is love, respect, and admiration (with a potential side-order of kink, hee-hee).

As for the kink, Kayla knows all about my submissiveness and has read my blog, as explained in Post 77.  Obviously if she moves in with us she will be a witness to my submissiveness.  I told her that she can have nothing to do with it if she chooses.  It is my life and my choice, and she is free to live as she chooses.  She indicated she is very intrigued by DD or D/s.  Being as studious as she is, she has been reading a lot about it since we first talked.  She says she is excited and curious about exploring some facets of submission for herself.   All of the discussion has been between her and I. I encouraged her to talk to Mike, but she admits being nervous and embarrassed about talking to him.  She said she just finds it hard to talk to him about her specific needs and desires.

I told her it that if she decides to become a submissive she needs to articulate what submission means to her.  Mike needs to understand how to best be her Dom and it can help me in helping her as well.  I told her if it were easier she could just write it all down.  It didn’t have to be like my contract, it could be more like an essay or even just bullet points.  Whatever way she feels comfortable in communicating it.

She liked that idea and has been working on “her document” as she calls it and plans to give it to Mike and I soon.  She also asked both Mike and I to prepare something for her and we can “exchange” documents.  She wants us to write out our suggestions on what we think would work for her.   Her hopes are after sharing the documents and talking through them that she can come up with a final document, akin to having her own contract.

Mike and I are working on our suggestions and we will be exchanging documents soon, hopefully this week.  With some risk she could read this before then, my list is not going to be very specific.  It is not for me to request any particular acts of submission from her.  My suggestions will be about letting go and approaching her submission as simply allowing herself to risk her vulnerability.  It is through becoming vulnerable that I have received the greatest joy and growth in my submission and believe she can receive the same.  I will share my observations on what I believe makes her feel vulnerable, but ultimately, it should only be about things that are true to her regardless of my thoughts or Mike’s.

Oh, and we talked about the living arrangements.  At first we were thinking of putting her in a spare bedroom that is actually an extension of our master bedroom.  I mentioned before this room is normally a separate bedroom with an entry in the hallway, but we opted to put a door to that room into our master bedroom.  It was a great room to have when our son was little.   We have two large doors that open to the master and when you immediately step into our bedroom, to the left is the door to the spare room, and to the right is the master bedroom.

Anyway, in talking with Kayla we decided it best that she have something that is more physically separated from us so that it feels more like her own space.   Mike may move his office into the spare room off the master and have Kayla take what is now his office as her bedroom.   We also talked about simply relocating the door to that spare room next to the master.  It isn’t all that much work to dry wall up the existing door and install a door in the hallway.  It’s something Mike feels he can do himself over a weekend.   We’ll see.

She wants to move in on 12/26.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

92. The Inspection.  Defining Necessary.