I am past due on giving you pervs what you really want – a discipline story! Despite what you might conclude from my posts, spankings are not a daily thing, and infrequent of late – over a month now, and I am not complaining! (I am referring to disciplinary actions and not the spankings at Maintenance).
I mentioned in the 367. NO-vember post that I had an a UO (Unauthorized Orgasm). Read the end of that post for an explanation if you need it.
It happened in October, and thus far has been the only time I’ve orgasmed without permission. At that particular time I was allowed to masturbate at will – edging, no climax. One morning I awoke early in my bed a bit “tingly” down there. I didn’t recall having any sexually charged dream, but my kibbles and bits were giving off a subtle, yet noticeable, thrilling sensation. Hey, it happens to the best of us!
I reached down to check out what’s going on and, indeed, I was a bit moist! I thought I would reward myself with a little more of the thrilling sensation and then simply stop. I knew my journey to the O will take at least five minutes of manual stimulation, probably closer to ten. I wasn’t being overly aggressive in my diddling as I didn’t want to wake Mike or Kayla. Not out of shame – as clearly, I have none (hee-hee), but out of simple courtesy. So I diddled and diddled, confident my O was far away.
I was going at it two-handed style, one to explore around town and one to focus on the main event. That’s the clit, by the way. lol. I think you get the picture. I found I was approaching the O much faster than usual. I stopped, and waited for my heart rate to get back to normal. I could have stopped, but felt a second round of edging was in order and well within what I could handle as I couldn’t possibly be that close.
This time I went too far. I rapidly ascended the O-meter, racing towards the peak at break-neck speed. Well, not my neck, but my knuckles for sure. I stopped, in time, so I thought. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on perspective, the momentum of pleasure took me over the edge. I came.
And I did so with far too much intensity to have a shot at a ruined orgasm, as is required if I happen to come without permission.
As good as it felt, I was disappointed. I broke a rule. It doesn’t matter the rule. Breaking any rule is unfulfilling to me. And I had taken a lot of satisfaction from the fact that it had been over ten months since giving Mike my orgasm and I had never came without permission, until then.
It was a “Oh, shit,” moment of rule breaking, but I must admit, as disappointed as I was, I still told myself, “but that felt really good.”
In the morning I confessed to Mike. I was unsure of the punishment he had in mind, but history tells me he tends to try and associate the “punishment with the crime.”
Following Mike’s instructions, I laid on the bed with my body in an “X”, arms spread above me, legs spread below. I had to explain the details of what happened. As I talked he occasionally gave a hand slap to my pussy. Nothing too hard, but enough to get my attention. He lectured me about my pussy being “his” and my orgasms belonging to him.
It was a very different lecture for me. More on that later. As I’ve shared many times, I try to keep sex distinct from my discipline. Sure, we haven’t always been 100% effective in that, but maybe 95%-ish. It reflects a preference I established at the start of our DD.
He retrieved the flogger and softly began to flog between my legs, slowly increasing the intensity. Soft became mild, mild became medium. It was there that the sensations turned from a pleasure/pain mix to just pain. He stopped once my wincing and squirming became increasingly animated.
He walked away and returned with the hairbrush. He told me I would get two series of five hard – and yes, the target was my pussy. The five came in quick succession and on the fifth I instinctively closed my legs as I gritted my teeth from the pain. He told me to spread my legs right now else we start over. I complied. 5 more. Ouch!
He then called me to stand up and bend over. I got about ten or so on my butt. He hugged me, and all was forgiven.
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
A spanking implement care tip – especially when used on the kibbles and bits. We have some disinfectant wipes stored with our spanking implements. Whenever we retrieve an implement it gets wiped down, and wiped down again when we put it away. Spanking, especially with the flogger, can create micro tears in the skin that could invite germs and infection. And, If the object of the spanking is the vagina…well, even more inviting. So, keep your implements clean!
WE NOW RETURN TO OUR REGULAR PROGRAM
I do not disagree with Mike’s course of action. It was atypical, but within the scope of what I have agreed and accepted. He’s my husband to whom I submit to, and look to, for discipline regarding ALL my rules.
In the end, I did not equate this punishment to sex. It stung and I was a bit tender for about two days. But, funny thing (or not so funny depending on your perspective), there were times the tenderness was a bit pleasurable. A nice bonus, indeed, BUT, not enough to compensate for the physical pain that preceded it and, most importantly, the emotional pain of disappointing myself and Mike.
I feel I am still exploring this whole Orgasm Control/Denial thing. I have yet to completely figure out if it is truly for me.
On the “pro” side, I am loving it and I surprise myself by how much it has changed my views about my Orgasm. Both the idea of it and our implementation of it has tickled my submissive mind in all the wonderful ways I like it to be tickled.
BUT, on the “con” side, I can’t put my finger on it (ha, that’s a masturbation joke in case you missed it). I have this nagging feeling like it isn’t for me. It’s just too sexual and goes against my desires to keep my discipline separate form my sexual activities
But I don’t want to give up OC either! I can’t seem to reconcile those two thoughts.
And I have received “pussy spanking” before, although very rarely. Maybe this was the third or fourth time? So the punishment isn’t necessarily my issue. Or maybe it is?
Aha! Wait. That’s perfect A classic throw-back post where I share something, like a spanking, and follow it up with some esoteric ramble about the meaning of life, or in this case, something even better – the meaning of my orgasms!
That’s it. I rewarded you with the kinky post, so now it’s time to reward myself with a self indulgent post diving into trying to reconcile my inner conflict. Coming soon.
Uh. . . bad word choice!
12 thoughts on “374. Uh-Oh-gasm: PUNISHED”
I started OC with my gf for close to 7 months now. Yet she is very poor at controlling her orgasm in check while she is given verbal commands. It is still more of orgasm denial in her case. For example she needs puss spanking while on edge. But the beautiful thing is that it doesn’t stop her from dripping more. For me me OC is more about mind over matters. A submissive need not concentrate on the hornier aspect of edging. Instead she should be channeling her thoughts about how to avoid orgasm. There is opposite aspect to it as well and it is about cum on command. I don’t know whether you have tried on it.
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Opposite aspect? Do you mean trying to train her to orgasm quickly, “on command” with little stimulation? To some extent extended OC does the to me as I get desperate for release, but it’s more a byproduct of no O for long time than it is a specific goal or expectation on his part.
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I find orgasm control works well in doses, an up and down. We’ve played with it quite intensely over the last couple years. For me, one side or the other can’t stay too long. The pendulum is best. 🙂
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Just checking Jenny are still responding to emails?
A lot of guys are into edging and orgasm control so I’m not really that surprised to find that women can be into it and, of course, for whatever reason they are. I’d have to guess that figuring out your point of no return would be interesting since there’s really no telling when you can get to that point but, yeah, having the discipline to feel it coming (pun intended) and then just stop; do not pass go, don’t get your pussy spanked since you’re on the money about microtears and abrasions.
The thing I wonder about this is whether it’s really healthy to not orgasm and more so when so many experts (and sexperts) tout how healthy it is for mind and body; I wonder if, for your DD, if it’s “better” for you to not masturbate when the kibbles and bits get to tingling or, if you don’t start nothing, you can’t get in trouble for it and if you’re seriously trying to keep discipline separate from the sex you have, wow – how’s that playing out inside your head? Can’t wait to take a peek in there and see how you see this aspect of things.
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I haven’t read anything that indicates it’s bad for you. My own two-cents is that a prolonged period of arousal (which means a prolonged period of no release), means you are getting extra doses of all those feel good chemicals your body produces. Generally those chemicals have positive effects on mood and an anti-inflammatory response, so, wouldn’t more be better? i am sure it is all a matter of degrees because, as with most things in life, more is only better to a point. And while there are times I good defer masturbating to a time I am not on OC, often masturbation and edging are a required part of OC! And except for that one “fail,” I’ve always been able to stop in time.
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If it works, it’s all good, huh?
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I read your blog from time to time but this is the first time that I have wanted to write to you to share with you what I felt while reading the first part of your narrative. Your description of the unexpected onset of orgasm is both realistic and very colorful. You tell very well how it goes in a very cheerful and youthful tone that makes you want to experience what you are saying. ”
In “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”, a young man regresses and starts to stutter when he is infantilized by the sadistic head nurse, exactly the opposite happens to you.
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Thanks, J! Sorry I am not making the connection. How was my experience the opposite of that? I am curious and don’t want to miss out on your insight.
A failed interpretation in return analyzes the person who made it.
I suppose I identify with the young man whom the eruption of a sadistically castrating maternal figure makes regress to stuttering.
I wanted to say that this is clearly not your case, on the contrary.
While you have not respected the rule and will be punished for it, neither during the caresses nor after the pleasure, nor during or after the punishment, this prospect leads to regression in you.
On the contrary: you tell the story in a very charming and humourous way of your way to orgasm and tell without bragging or dramatization your punishment.
A question: what images, what stories do you call on (in your mind) when you caress yourself? If that is the case, do they involve erotic feelings of guilt?
Excuse me if I am redundant.
Thank you for clarifying. I understand. Part of it is that I’ve always had a tendency to respond to “failure” with charm and wit. A “stupid is as stupid does,” approach. I don’t feel defeated or let some “stupid” feat define me. It’s simply something i did, and not who i am. Thus i can hold myself accountable and strive not to repeat the offense, absent feelings of guilt, insecurity, or “wrongness.” I was that way pre-DD, and even more so since.
My sexual fantasies are absent any guilt. I don’t feel guilty, dirty, or “less than,” even when they involve things I want to keep in the “fantasy” column versus the “been there/done that” column. The fantasies vary, but most commonly involve my husband or Kayla. They might include thoughts of me “performing” for a crowd, or having to do things against my wishes. Sometimes there is no “imagery” at all, and the thoughts are solely on what my fingers are doing and how great it feels. Whatever it is I am thinking of, guilt is no where to be found.