237. Weird in a Good Way – Cuckolding

237

I have sex with my husband, Mike, of course. And with our best friends and neighbors, John and Donna. And of course there is Kayla.  And as of about three months ago, there is Matt.   (Post 197).

I haven’t posted anything more about Matt since then. I think each time I had something to share, I had something else I felt more important to share.   Then, it just seemed too far in the past to bother writing about it.  I find it easier to write about something that is fresh on my mind, where any new thoughts and feelings are… well, still new.   It’s more difficult to be inspired to share once I’ve reconciled, incorporated, or moved on from something.

SEX WITH MATT
After our first sexual encounter in early December, we had another later that month.  Mike and Kayla also visited Matt – Matt had sex with Kayla.  In those initial encounters, Mike just watched.  In late December, Matt came over to our house and this time Mike participated as he and Matt had sex with Kayla and I.   And we introduced Matt to John and Donna.

Matt hit it off with John and Donna.  He is a likable guy.  Unassuming, almost shy.  A bit reserved but if you ask him something directly, he can go on and on in answering you.  I learned you just have to ask him directly, otherwise, he isn’t going to just tell you something or randomly interject his thoughts.

He is attractive — not like model, amazingly, incredibly, so, but attractive. And his demeanor and how he carriers himself is sexy.  And as I learned and shared previously, he is well endowed…8 1/2 inches.  I get that this is not like porn-star huge, but, still a personal record for me.   And it has the perfect thickness and overall look to it.    A very beautiful cock.    ahem,  oh…back to my story.

Matt attended the Super Bowl Party that  I missed.   In February,  Mike and I visited him once during one of our date nights, as did Mike and Kayla on one of their date nights.   Schedules and various commitments have precluded visited to/from Matt over the last three weeks or so.

CUCK
Mike confessed having what clearly is a cuckold fantasy.  He has always enjoyed watching me be sexual, such as masturbating, or having sex, whether with John, Donna, or Kayla.   But he said he gets a unique thrill of watching me with John.  Mike says the feelings are 100% erotic when he watches me with another woman, but watching me with John and Matt includes a dimension he can’t fully describe.

While the sex with Matt has included group settings (including Mike and Kayla, or even including Mike, Kayla, John, and Donna), many times it has just been one-on-on; just Matt and me, or just Matt and Kayla — with Mike nearby or watching.  The settings with Matt have been more intimate than say the times I am having sex with John, when Donna is there and it part of a larger “play date” or interaction.   We’ve gone to Matt’s, exchange a quick hello, have sex, and then a goodbye.  It is really much more about the act of sex and not much more than that.

WHAT MOTIVATES MIKE
Mike’s reasons are that he loves watching us (Kayla and I) be sexually fulfilled.   It also satisfies the voyeur in him, and he knows it satisfies the exhibitionist in me.  It also gives him a strong element of control over me.  He admits that the control factor is a big part of his thrill.  Of course, with our D/s, I grant him lots of control over me, which includes sex, but granting control is one thing, actually taking it is another.

WHAT MOTIVATES ME
Our agreement specifically addresses that he may demand any sexual or physical act to be performed upon or by me whether it be by or upon him or any other person.  At the time I agreed to this, I specifically wanted Mike to be willing to explore whatever sexual fantasies he had regarding me.  And I still do.   It is part of my fulfillment of being submissive.

Mike often asks me about my feelings about something he commanded, whether sexual or otherwise.  I am not allowed to simply say, “If it makes you happy, then I am happy.”   He wants to know how I feel beyond the satisfaction I get from submission.

In the case of sex with Matt, yes, pleasing Mike pleases me. – that’s a given.  And, it also excites the exhibitionist in me, and I enjoy being the “COA” (Center of Attention) when it comes to sex.  Heck, it’s what prompted me to first masturbate in front of John and Donna way back when.   Yes, I love being a sexual COA, especially when that attention is from Mike.

You may think it requires a lot of self-confidence to be COA.   I don’t consider myself sexually self-confident.  I am not void of confidence, just not over flowing with it.  I do have insecurities – there are things about my body that I know aren’t all that attractive.  Forcing myself to be COA actually builds my self-confidence and is my way of telling my insecurities to “F” off as they aren’t going to limit me.   So yes, having sex with Matt, with Mike watching or knowing about it — definite turn on for me!

Lastly, we BOTH admit to simply enjoying the excitement, fulfillment, and stimulation from the sexual exploration of something that is considered taboo.   Just the thought of it is a bit stimulating, let alone actually doing it!

MOTIVATED BY SCIENCE?
Studies show that if a man believes his wife has been with other men (even if she really hasn’t), that belief can change the man’s physiology.  Their passion increases, their sperm count increases, they get erect sooner, ejaculate more, can get erect again more quickly after sex, and simply have an increased sex drive.

The biology around this is simply the human desire to procreate.  If a man senses “competition,” their body has evolved to react with increased sexual prowess and desire.  These changes occur even when the cuckolding is voluntary.

One other interesting bit of research is that cuckolding couples are excellent communicators.  The doctor running one study stated “they may be some of the most communicative people I‘ve ever seen.”   I believe that aptly describes Mike and I.

KAYLA
Kayla is completely comfortable having sex with Matt.  She described the first time as thrilling because she was actually a little scared.  Not scared of being harmed, but scared of the unknown and worried she would somehow let down Matt and thus letdown Mike.

I haven’t written a lot about Kayla lately.   She reads my blog.  It would be unfair for her to learn through the blog how I feel about something concerning her.  We talk quite a bit, thus I could share what we discuss; however, I also feel it is unfair if she has to read about something that she is still trying to work through herself.  It’s one thing for the two of us to have a discussion, and another for her to have it out there for all my readers to see.   Even though this blog has anonymity, there is still a feeling of having all your stuff “out there” for the world to see.  That can be frustrating or intimidating if you are still trying to work through the issues yourself.

BACK TO MATT
So Matt is now an official member of our Circle of Trust, which means… well, which means whatever Mike wants it to mean.  We may continue our visits to Matt’s place and he to ours, as well as invite him over when we have adult fun at John and Donna’s.   Mike told me he thought about inviting Matt to spend some nights at our house– those thoughts went so far as to consider having him stay over with me when Mike and Kayla were out of town.

Mike asked me for my thoughts on that and I was agreeable, so long as we made sure to keep his presence unknown to J.  The plan was that Matt would leave before J got up for school, or, would stay hidden away in our bedroom until J left for school.   In the end, Mike decided against having Matt over while he was out –at least this time.   I told Mike it would be weird to have Matt alone with me in our house, in our bed — but weird in a good way — which frankly, sums up our entire dynamic!   LOL!

Next: 238. Mystery Blogger Award

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19 thoughts on “237. Weird in a Good Way – Cuckolding”

  1. This is very disturbing. How can ANYONE, not just you have any self respect jumping into bed with multiple partners? And how in the good Lord’s name can any man have any respect for themselves allowing their wife do this? This is messed up and very immoral. God will find you guilty of violating HIS standards, just he has had to discipline me for violating his standards. God says to have sex with ONE person, a husband with the wife, and only them. I hope you all find that this is not the right way to live your lives. God has better for you than this. May you all find him and learn what he has for you. This is NOT it?

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    1. Before I address the specifics, I want to be clear I 100% support your right to feel this lifestyle is not for you. I also support your right to question if it is right for me, after all, I had similar questions myself when we first started down this wonderful path. But I object using some third party book as the arbiter of what is right and wrong. I have a lot of self respect. I have complete pride and confidence in myself and feel honored to dignified in my sexual adventures. As for finding Him and learning what He has for me, let’s see what He has in mind for all of us…. KILL are unmarried pregnant women (Genesis 38:24). KILL infants of non-Christians (2 Samuel 12:14), KILL all homosexuals (Leviticus 20:13), PROTECT all slave owners from disobedient slaves (1 Peter 2:16), KILL all who work on Sundays (Exodus 31:15). When did you last live up to THOSE standards? Least we forget, Moses had two wives. Then there is the stipulation you could marry captured prisoners from foreign conquests (Deuteronomy 21:1-17). Or the provisions for continuing the family line by marrying a brother’s wife if he died without producing heirs (Deuteronomy 25:5-12). And the stories keep coming: Gideon, one of Israel’s champions, had many wives; Elkanah, a presumably godly man and the father of Samuel, had two wives. And the list goes on.

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      1. I see that you quoted only Old Testament books. Certain things of the law, which those references you quoted are talking about, we’re fulfilled when Christ died and rose again in the New Testament. He fulfilled the law from the Old Testament and brought in the age of grace through his death and resurrection on the cross. And the New Testament set up some different standards than the old, not all of them, because we still have to listen to the Old Testament on many things. Homosexuality will always be a sin and will be judged by God, along with those who practice AND support the lifestyle, And the Sabbath It’s still to be honored. And two or more wives is wrong, still to this day. But other things you quoted from the old testament we’re fulfilled with Christ. Now there’s a new standard. And you cannot use some of those passages to justify your lifestyle to be right, for it’s NOT. It is immoral, and completely sinful before the Lord, just like anything I would do that violates his word.You can have your lifestyle. I am not saying I’m better than you. I am far from being better than anybody. But I can judge your actions When I compare them by the word of God, which is complete truth. And your lifestyle is going to get you hurt, somewhere down the line, sooner or later. That is not what God wants for you. You are to have sex with only your husband, not others. That is something the Lord will judge you on. And I hope you will understand at some point that this lifestyle you live is only going to land you in a world of devastation, and I hope you turn away from it before that happens. And it would be wrong of me to know that you’re doing something wrong and not warn you. God loves you, and he doesn’t want this life for you, or your husband, or those people you sleep with. And I don’t want you to have to answer for that before God one day. He would want you to come out of this lifestyle and choose to live by his standards by coming to the Lord Jesus Christ. But you have the choice to ignore my warning, which I get from the Bible, and you can do whatever you want. But I hope one day you learn and realize that this is not right. Now I’m done, I won’t say another word about it, and You can do anything you want, but you will live and die by your choices. But this is a choice you will not be able to get away with in the end.

        God bless.

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        1. oh I see, so in other words, the new testament was a do-over. So the old testament doesn’t apply…except for the parts that YOU say apply, which are not the bad parts, but only the good parts because of Jesus. But what of the clear contradictions even within the new? Acts 2:21 vs Matthew 7:21. Or the over 300,000 commonalities they share. Why the do-over? By the way, Odin and Zeuss have plans for you. They love you and don’t want false prophets in your life. You will have to answer before them one day. But you have the choice to ignore my warning, which I get from many ancient texts, even older than yours, and you can do whatever you want. But I hope one day you learn and realize what is right for you isn’t always right from everyone else. The thing is, I will get away with a fulfilling life, full of joy and amazing experiences. Because my god doesn’t threaten me with eternal damnation. My Shiva be with you. And Poseidon, Athena, Thor, Ares, Apollo, oh, and let’s not forget Anubis, Ra, Amun Ra, Vishnu, Gaea, Thr, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. May they all bless you!

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  2. Way back in my open relationship days, one of the things I had to learn – and get used to – was watching other people making love to my wife and the first time you see it, wow, you quickly learn that it’s easy to think you’d be okay with it but seeing it – and more so when your partner is having one hell of a good time – well, let’s say it takes some getting used to.

    If you, as I like to say, are grown up enough, you do get used to it and it makes you oddly happy to see your partner enjoying themselves with someone else – the word I learned was compersion or if they’re happy, it makes you happy as well. Someone asked me if it bothered me to watch her having sex with other men and women and if I worried about someone rocking her boat better than I could… and I said no, it didn’t because my duty as her husband is to ensure her happiness and there are really no limits to how this takes shape, including this. It just makes sense and, in my opinion, it’s better (and more fun) that knowing she’s out there doing whatever and you have no idea what she’s doing or who.

    Besides, wow, it’s pretty damned hot being in this situation. I don’t know about the cuckold fetish thing (I know what the word originally implied and it was not fun) but it’s realizing that you and your partner are able to banish the usual insecurities and rules about being married because there’s the usual expected behavior required of married folks… then there’s what a couple has to do in order to make sure their marriage is the best it can be – so fuck the rules.

    Yep, it’s in our nature that if someone else has our woman, well, we gotta get in there and “remind” her who’s really “owns” the pussy and that reclamation sex can be very damned intense and pleasing. It might sound petty on our part but we’re just hard-wired to behave like this… and even if we’re not aware that we’re behaving like this.

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  3. I’d heard that bit about a man’s biology before, but it was in a movie so I didn’t put much stock in it. I’ve had a talk with HD about this (sharing is a fantasy of his), and looking at it this way (and reading your highly positive experiences) makes it more appealing to me. I guess we’ll see how it goes.
    I admire your ability to tell your insecurities to “f” off like that! 🙂 I am not brave enough to be the center of attention, I would be so self-conscious.

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    1. That is a lie. It tears down the relationship. When sin is involved, it NEVER helps the marriage, but destroys it, sooner or later. Sin was never meant to help, but hurt, and kill.

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      1. My truth is not a lie. It simply doesn’t jive with “your truth.” I do not believe in the existence of a supernatural being who looks after my moral well-being and is displeased and will punish me if I violate their will (i.e. “sin”). That doesn’t mean I have no morals or ethics – just that I am responsible for myself and fellow humans, animals, and earth, not because of fear of retribution by an invisible sky-god, but because I BELIEVE IT IS THE RIGHT WAY TO LIVE. The sexual adventures I go on do nothing to impact my morals or ethics. My marriage has never been stronger, and nothing we have done since adopting DD and our chosen lifestyle has hurt it. If there is a “sin” in a relationship, it is being anything other than 100% open and transparent about everything. It is the sin of unstated wants and needs that eat at us, cause us to undermine our relationships, and cause us to hurt the other. I love 100% of my husband, and he 100% of me. No hidden agenda, no hidden wants or desires. I venture to guess if some people just a few of their secrets with their significant other, their relationship would be over. Who has the stronger relationship?

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