188. The Cock Block (or is it Clam Jam?)

RooClam

I know this Michaud-wrinkle is a bit off topic regarding my DD.  But it isn’t off topic regarding my life.  It is very interesting to me and Kayla means so much to me.  I am happy she is allowing me to share all this.  It’s full of suspense, drama, and sexual intrigue!   And I am so excited for Kayla and impressed (beyond words…which means, here comes a bunch of words) with how she has handled it thus far.  Her handling of this really shows us that she has been listening to the things we have been trying to instill in her since she moved in.  Things like openness, strength, confidence, and honesty.  She’s nailing it! 

By the way – It is going to be about two weeks before all of us can get in to see the doctor and get our results.

IT STARTED WITH A QUESTION
“Sir, please know I heard what you said and understood and accept it.  You told me that there is to be no sex with Michaud and you would only allow kissing.  I am not questioning your decision and would like to know if anything has transpired such that you are willing to reconsider?”

There are times openness must be rewarded.  Times when trust and confidence between Dom and sub can be strengthened.  When a Dom leads best by knowing it is time to listen and understand, and not a time to punish.  

Kayla was trying to be very diplomatic.  It’s tough for a sub to walk the “disobedient” line.  Mike could have taken the “hard ass” response and disciplined her for asking him a second time.  Instead, he thanked her for respectfully posing this question.  Further, he praised her for her guts to ask him this as he knew it was difficult for her to do so. “Obviously this is important to you, so sure, let’s talk through it.”

THE REAL QUESTION
Mike then asked Kayla, “So, you want to have sex with him?”

Kayla said, “Honestly, yes Sir, but, that’s not my question.  I am not asking you to reconsider.  We will wait for the test results.  It is the other stuff…I mean, could we do more than just kiss?” 

Mike was true to form in getting down to what exactly was being asked.   He replied, “So you mean you want to say, give him a hand job or have him finger you, or fondle and suck your breasts?”

“Yes, sure, Sir,” she replied, “At least have the option.” 

Mike questioned, “Don’t you think the passion would lead to penetration or oral sex?”

Kayla quickly and confidently responded, “No, Sir.  I would not allow it.  And any shortcoming in my willpower is more than made up for in my obedience to you.  I am confident I can resist simply because you have prohibited it, Sir.”

“I believe you,” said Mike, “but, are you equally confident in Michaud’s willpower?” 

“I am confident he will listen to me,” she said in a hopeful tone.  That hopeful tone grew more commanding as she added, “And the fact he is willing to have the tests tells us he doesn’t have anything to hide and,” she added with declaration, “he said he would use a condom.”  Kayla’s voice had this “Yeah, what about THAT” sass to it. 

OOPS.  KAYLA EARNS A SPANKING
Mike responded with his “you’ve-crossed-the-line” voice.  “Kayla, you just said you agreed with me and were not asking me to reconsider the ‘no-sex’ edict.  Now your statement and your tone says otherwise.  We are supposed to be having a conversation not a debate where you try and find a ‘Gotcha’ moment.   We will finish this conversation and I will address your sassy tone when we are done.  Understood?”

“Yes, Sir, I am sorry,”  replied Kayla.

MIKES EDICT
Mike immediately flipped back to his calm and reassuring tone, “Kayla, you know both of us trust your judgment.  I trust that you can limit yourself to safer sexual activity, but even you said you don’t have complete confidence in Michaud.  And him agreeing to take the test is not the same as actually having the test.  He hasn’t had it yet, has he?  And, maybe he isn’t aware of something he has.  And why would he even bring up using a condom if he wasn’t trying to undermine what you already told him about waiting?  I am curious, what prompted you to even ask me this question today?”

“Well Sir, he invited me to his apartment after we made out by my car today.  It was pretty clear to me I wouldn’t be going over to watch Netflix.  I told him I could not come over as we had to wait for the lab results.  If it wasn’t clear already that we were talking about sex, his response made it very clear.  Michaud said ‘Come on, I’ll use a condom, and we don’t even have to have sex-sex.  Can’t we at least just mess around?’  So yes Sir, this is why I am asking.”

I asked Kayla, “So what was your response to Michaud when he said that?”

“I told him I promised you and Mike that there would be no sex until we had the results and there was nothing that would make me break that promise.”

“And then what did he say,” I asked.

“He said okay, he understood.  And then he added that the anticipation would just make it all the better.”

Mike stated, “So even after you told him you can’t come over he tried to justify his request by saying he would use a condom.  In other words, he still tried to influence you to say yes?” 

“Yes, Sir,” she said with disappointment, “I guess he did.”

Mike, always the one to avoid ambiguity, said, “No guessing about it. Whether it was his intent or not, it was an attempt to manipulate.  As if he expected you to say, ‘Oh, well, a condom, then sure, let’s go!’  Tell you what Kayla.  You are 23, and fully capable of making this decision on your own.  I know what advice I would give you if we were just friends.  I also know what command I would give as your Dom.  Do you want my advice, or do you want my command?” 

She hesitated.  As she later explained it, not because she was unsure of the answer, but it took her a moment to process the question.  As soon as it clicked what she was being asked, she answered, “Dom.  Always my Dom, Sir.  Please, I will abide by your command.” 

Mike thanked her for her trust and confidence and added, “I don’t believe it serves any useful purpose to play with fire.  You can continue the public affection of kissing or even holding hands, but the answer is still no on any sexual activity.  You also are not to go to his apartment until I tell you.”

KAYLA EARNS A CONCESSION
It was clear she was disappointed, but she understood and accepted his order.  But she very squeamishly added, “Sir, I thank you for allowing this conversation and I again commit to following your orders as always.  To make sure there is no miscommunication, I do have one more question as a point of clarity, and not questioning your command. Does sexting, phone sex, or cam-sex count?”

Mike thought for moment, then for another, and then another. 

Then he said, “Sorry for the pause.  I’ll just think it out loud so you know my thought process on this one.  My inclination is to say yes, that counts so don’t do it.  But, to be honest, I think I am feeling that way only because I can, because, well, you do as I say.  But, such things don’t put us at risk, and doesn’t put you at risk of any STD.  And if I trust your judgement that your relationship with him is ready for that, then what’s my reasoning?  I do trust your judgement.  If you feel you want to do those things, I won’t prohibit them.”

A very happy Kayla responded with a hug and “Thank you, Sir.”

MIKES CONDITIONS
“However,” Mike added, “our house rules prohibit secrecy in the house.  Just like I can access and read your emails, texts and social media accounts today, your relationship with Michaud is no different.  You must show me your texts when I ask for them and any phone calls, whether sex talk or not, and any cam-sex, shall not be done in secret.  While you don’t have to go out of your way to tell us what you are doing, you won’t go out of your way to hide those activities.  Unless J is awake, your bedroom door and bathroom doors remain open.  Neither Jenny or I will make it a point to listen in or watch, but what you do in this house is never hidden and is subject to my inspection or observation at any time.”

“And,” Mike added, “you need to tell Michaud that I am requiring the “no sex until tests are in” rule and I am allowing the sexting/phone sex/cam-sex.  If your relationship with him is ever going to work he will need to understand your commitment to me.  No need to delay that understanding.  Make it clear to him that you won’t have sex with him right now as a commitment you’ve made to me.  Further, if there are any actions that you do that are because of my demands, you need to share that with him.  Don’t sugar coat it by making it seem to be your choice or your preference.  If it is something I demand, then you explain it to him that way.  If he can’t handle that, then it will be good for you two to deal with that right now instead of later.  If he can handle it, well, then that’s a great sign that your relationship has a clear runway for take off.

“Thank you, Sir,” Kayla smiled, “I can do that.  I will do that.” 

“Now,” as Mike’s tone became stern, “About that sass from earlier…”

KAYLA TALKS WITH MICHAUD
Kayla talks with Michaud every day and texts incessantly.  Even when they don’t have class together they get together for lunch or dinner and a movie. 

Kayla said she is encouraged by their conversations regarding Michaud’s ability to handle her being in a relationship with us plus her submissiveness to Mike — the latter being the bigger challenge.   Michaud is still a bit perplexed by it, but seems to be trying to understand it.   He seems very enamored and intrigued with Kayla and her lifestyle choices, but that could quickly wear off if there relationship gets more serious.  

Kayla told him that it was Mike’s demand of her regarding ‘no sex until labs are in but sexting and cam are okay.’  Kayla said this prompted more conversation with Michaud on exactly what role Mike fulfills for her.  And there was the natural and expected comment from Michaud of, “Well, would you do those things for me?”  

Kayla was clear she would not.  She told him she would not consider having multiple Doms.  She told Michaud she wants him for him; a friend, a confidant, and yes, a lover too.  All the things “normal” to a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.   The twist is such things would not be exclusive.  She told him, “Mike and Jen are those things for me too, and that won’t change.”   And she told Michaud that if it helps, think of Mike somewhat as “a heavily influential and strict parent whom I love, adore, respect, and never want to disappoint.”   (btw, Mike was okay with this description).

Further, Kayla told Michaud that it is a deal breaker if he does anything to attempt to undermine Mike’s authority over her.   She told him such undermining, such as encouraging misbehavior, would end their relationship.  She told him she doesn’t expect or need him to be a cheerleader for it, but he must be tolerant of it and never attempt to undermine. 

I copied this from one of her texts to him.   

KAYLA:  It’s not a contest.  I need Mike as my Dom and I want you as my boyfriend.  Hopefully those things are compatible.  if not, we can’t continue.  😦  If this seems too complicated, I understand.  No hard feelings.  I don’t want to scare you away, but I don’t want to lure you in under false pretenses.  You are going to have to put up with some weird relationship shit that is unlike any you put up with before.  I am telling you now that whatever those shit situations are, they will never be a reflection of any shortcoming you have as person or a boyfriend.  They are a reflection of my need to be submissive to Mike.

MICHAUD:  You are already giving me the “It’s not you, it’s me” speech?   j/k.  I get it. You just being real.  I like that.

KAYLA:  LOL.  yeh somethin like that.  In other words, I am the weird one, not you.  So if you like weird, here I am, but then don’t complain about the weirdness

MICHAUD:  Not weird, just different.  Different good.  Can I complain just a little?  

KAYLA:   I am not telling you that you can’t have feelings.  jealousy, betrayal and crap like that.  understandable.  I want you to share those feelings the moment you feel them.  lets address them.  But sharing isn’t complaining if done right.  Just ask questions from a loving place, not judgmental or frustrated place.

MICHAUD:  That shouldn’t be too hard, cuz I love you.

KAYLA:  Good, you’ll need lots of love to deal with this.  And I love you for giving me a chance and being such a great guy.

MICHAUD:  You make it easy to love you.  At least so far— ha. But I get it.  I’ll let you know if it gets hard. 

KAYLA:  I appreciate that you think you get it for now.  But you probably won’t until you live it.  Love you for that. 

MICHAUD:  Love ya too

KAYLA:  Cam? 

Next: 189. Happiness, Pleasure, Love, Intimacy, Sex: Jenny rambles

 

 

 

 

 

11 thoughts on “188. The Cock Block (or is it Clam Jam?)”

    1. I didn’t catch that. Mike frequently reads her texts (and emails and social media and occasionally goes through her phone – and mine!). He has warned her and punished her regarding language in texts and social media — she is not even allowed to retweet things containing vulgar language. He didn’t recall reading these particular texts. He isn’t going to punish her for it but will use the opportunity to remind her. Thanks for the catch, someone!

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  1. You all are handling this with such grace! I hope you won’t find this offensive in any way, but each morning I log in hoping to see an update from you…the suspense is incredible! I know this is the real life that you three (and now, four) are living, but I think for your readers it is this incredibly enlightening story about the human spirit.

    And kudos to Mike for not letting Kayla get away with her attempt at a “gotcha” moment…I love how consistent he always is!

    My best to all of you! Your faithful reader, nora

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    1. Thank you. The thing is, I FEEL THE SAME WAY. I think Kayla’s experience with Michaud will be very enlightening for her and an opportunity for tremendous growth, regardless of the outcome. I great opportunity to spread her wings that she acquired over the last year. I am so excited for her I can’t stand it. I want to know where this goes!! I suspect I will continue to share as things evolve.

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