This post is mostly about Donna. There was an “incident” this week worth sharing regarding our “experiment” with Donna staying with us while John is away. (I shared the story of when Mike went out of town in this post). As I mentioned in another prior post, John required Donna to follow all the rules I am subject to, just as if my contract with Mike applied to her. That lasted through yesterday and starting today she went back to her normal rules with Mike filling in for John.
Having Donna around has been wonderful. I’ve had a lot of free time this week as the tasks get done in no time. In addition to the helping hand from a fellow sub, I have a friend to talk with and, as a final bonus, an extra lover to share with. As I suspected though, it has been far easier on me and Mike than it has been on Donna. Here’s what happened:
There was a point in the day yesterday where we weren’t quite done with our tasks when Donna proclaimed she was taking a break. I told her I appreciated her help but the responsibility with the chores are mutual, and I prefer we finish before taking a break. She encouraged me to take a break as well, but I told her I could not. I didn’t want to come off as the bitch, but, I wanted to get everything done first.
I shared with her that I learned from experience that if I procrastinate, things can happen and then the tasks don’t get done. That would be unacceptable to me and to Mike. And – we didn’t have that much more to do anyway! Her logic was, “Well Jen, since there isn’t that much more to do, you can just do it.” So I did, but told her was compelled to tell Mike.
I reminded her that John asked Mike to question us about the day and specifically ask if she did her fair share. I told her I cannot lie to Mike and would have to tell him. I felt bad. Donna was a huge help and I know this has been hard on her. But, John set this rule for her and she should understand that rules from our Sirs are, well, the rules. She wasn’t open to hearing me and flippantly said, “As long as everything is done what’s the big deal and tomorrow I can make up for it.”
I responded that I was not in a position to barter on behalf of John. She continued to resist and said, “I’ve pretty much done my fair share today.” I told her that this was true up to the point she sat down, but unless she gets up and helps finish things up that it would be untrue. She shrugged me off.
In the evening when our son was watching TV, Mike pulled Donna and me aside to ask us about our day. He of course asked about the fair share of the workload. I looked at Donna and said, “Sorry, Donna, but I have to be truthful.” I proceeded to tell Mike what had happened.
Mike ordered both of us to the bedroom. We both went to my room, disrobed, and stood in separate corners waiting for Mike. It was a bit over an hour before he finally came in as he waited for our son to go to bed. That was the longest I’ve ever stood in the corner and I was puzzled why I should be punished for Donna’s behavior.
When Mike came in he called us over and asked each of us bend over and he gave us each some warm ups with his hand. He asked us why we were being punished. Donna stated it was because she didn’t do her fair share of the work today, but for me, I had no clue.
Mike confirmed Donna explanation and added that John was explicit in his instructions and her failure to obey them by not doing her fair share was indeed why he would need to spank her. Then, per our rules Mike administered another spanking on me for not knowing the reasons why I was being punished. He then told me the reason. I was being punished for apologizing to Donna. WTF?!?
Mike said that I should never apologize for my submission. Being truthful is part of my submission and not something to apologize for. He said my apology was basically apologizing for being submissive. He said if my submissiveness inconveniences Donna, so be it. No different than if Donna’s submission to John inconveniences me. Mike said I was being punished for being disrespectful to my own submission.
Whoa! I was a bit dumbfounded. Part of me was thinking, “Are you serious?” while another part of me was, “Wow, Mike, how observant and creative, and yes, you are absolutely correct!”
Mike said this was a serious issue and the spanking was going to be with the prison strap. He skipped the “Over/Under” game which was another signal to me that he was in a more serious mood about this transgression. I got 17, then Donna got 12.
Uncharacteristically, Donna cried and got very emotional. She takes punishments very stoically and I’ve seen her gleefully take far worse in “fun” scenes her and John put on for us. As I shared before, their relationship is a bit more M/s and BDSM. I knew it wasn’t because of the sting from the spanking.
Donna apologized to me and Mike and reassured us it wasn’t anything we did. She shared that it was hard being out of her normal routine. In the past when John was gone she at least had her routine to keep her “observant,” as she put it. Even though John ordered her to follow my routine, it just didn’t feel “observant” to her. She said a part of her wanted to rebel and that was her motivation for not finishing the work.
She has been at this submissive thing much longer than me and really relies on John to keep her centered and focused. I hadn’t really considered that submissiveness can lead to a greater dependency on the Dom. You get so accustomed to giving such incredible focus on the needs of your Dom and being “observant” to your submission that you feel out of sync when your Dom isn’t around.
I know I missed Mike when he was out of town, but I didn’t miss him the way Donna misses John. I think having my son to focus on and still having my routine made it easy for me when Mike was gone. Although John did task her following my rules from Sunday to Wednesday, it still didn’t feel quite like she was serving him. She said it felt like she was serving Mike and me.
The good news was this occurred on the last day she had to adhere to the rules I have. Today she was extremely upbeat and cheerful. At the moment I am writing this she and Mike are over at her house getting some daily “treatment” that John usually gives her. It involves hot wax, vibrator, whip, and sex. What a treatment! Afterwards Mike will come home and Donna will stay home awhile longer and Skype with John, which will include some kinky acts I am sure. Then Donna will come over and spend the night with us.
I am not sure what John has in store for her starting Sunday, as he indicated he would have further changes in routine for Donna to follow. Both Mike and Donna will share with John what happened and the reasons why, so perhaps John won’t revert back to having her be subject to my routine and rules. I know between Mike and John they will come up with something creative and rewarding for Donna.
Interesting, but Donna still helped out today with all my chores. There were three major differences. One, it was her choice to help out. Two, she got to do them with her collar on. Finally, she got to wear her “item of the day.” John and Donna have a TTWD where one hour a day she has to wear the “item of the day.” It could be a tack bra (and she has a mean looking tack bra made with upholstery tacks), butt plug, nipple/clit clamps, ankle or wrist cuffs, and I am sure I am forgetting some other things., Yes, sometime she has to walk around with her feet cuffed. There is enough slack that she can walk, but she has to take very small steps. Although Mike and I haven’t tried everything they do, you can see where I get some of my ideas!
I am glad this incident resolved itself amicably. More fun and adventure ahead! I learned that Donna’s happy place is when she is mindful and observant to her submission. I have identified many words in several different posts to describe my own feelings about submission – calm (Post 23), love, sexy, and sensible (Post 27), open (Post 30), fulfilling (Post 33), but I forgot the most basic one.
Happy! Submission is my happy place too.